5 Tips for Emailing Your Child’s Teacher

School has started back up and routines have set in. Except for one thing — your child is struggling at school

Perhaps they are getting into trouble. Maybe they are coming home telling you that someone is picking on them. Or this is now the third failing grade in a row!

The concerns your child shares with you are important, but they are often only a part of the story. As parents, we are not in the classroom each day experiencing the same thing as our children. It is important to validate their concerns, but also understand the broader context. This is where emailing your child’s teacher may be helpful.

As a career educator for over two decades, serving in numerous roles, I am no stranger to parent emails. On the flip side, as a parent, I have been on the sending side of teacher emails. When an email is sent to the school, it’s important to remember some tips to make the communication productive and in partnership.

Here are 5 things to keep in mind:

1. Email the teacher first: As a principal, I often received emails from upset parents about something that happened in their child’s classroom. My first question is always “Have you reached out to the teacher?” While I am eager to help resolve issues, the teacher is more likely to know the situation’s context, history, and resolution. Always reach out to the teacher first. If the problem is not addressed or if you do not receive a response, then it might be appropriate to follow-up with the administrator.
2. Focus on your child: If you have a concern about something that happened to your child, focus on your child. Educators are bound by laws that do not allow us to discuss other students, so we can only discuss your child with you. In addition, avoid phrases like “all the parents were talking” or “the entire class.” If you do know of other parents who have a similar concern, encourage them to reach out to the teacher as well.
3. Strive for partnership: The school-home relationship is important, and working alongside your child’s teacher for a solution to a problem is important. The first solution may not always be the final answer, but working together to experiment and provide feedback is helpful in the process. This approach also shows the child a positive relationship between the teacher and parent, which is helpful in the child’s perception of the learning environment.
4. Allow time to respond: While parents may have the ability to send an email during the workday, teachers are typically not able to respond to emails or messages until after school or the next day. Allow at least 48 hours before following up with the teacher.
5. Stick to facts: When we feel like our child has been hurt or a victim, emotions can run strong. When communicating with your child’s school, stick to the facts of the situation. Avoid threatening or opinionated verbiage that takes the focus away from what occurred. Resolution can come quicker and clearer this way. For example, instead of “my son says you yelled at him unfairly,” try “my son came home upset and said you told him to sit down during an activity.”

The most important thing to remember is that both parents and educators are fighting for the same thing: the best interest of the child. Clear and respectful communication when a problem arises fixes issues faster and makes for a more positive experience for all!

Stress at school can show up in kids as stomach aches, sleep trouble, and outbursts. Your child’s pediatrician can serve as a helpful guide during this. At Joyful Pediatrics, we have the ability to help guide your family from both the medical and educational perspectives.